Straight jokes

Whats one thing gay people can’t draw? a straight line.

Why did Sally stare out the window for 24 hours straight? Sally’s used to being blind!

I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it. Then I remembered why I’m digging in our garden.

Are you a Bullet because you go straight throw my head

Roses are red my heart my heart is dead I have a gun straight to my head

What the difference between being gay and straight, well it is the hole

So a retarded kids mom drops her kid off at school and says “you better stop the bus today because I’m not picking you up” and so he agrees and he arrives at the bus stop and says “stop” (in a retarded voice) and the bus goes straight past him the next day the mom says the same thing and the kid goes to the bus stop and says “stop” (in a retarded voice) and the bus goes straight past him the third day his mom says “I don’t care if have to jump out in the middle of the road you better stop that bus” so the kid goes to bus stop and jumps out in the middle of the road and says “Stop!” The bus driver runs over him a nearby lady stops the bus and says “why’d you run that poor kid over” and he responds “‘cause he was making fun of me” (in a retarded voice)

You know what me and my spine both have in common we are both not straight

I don’t ever really bother women, but when I do I usually just want to talk, I guess since I just so happened to be a straight male that’s not a 10 or a 5, I get shutdown so fast, I put out lit candles…like damn, I thought I hid my ring

I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A’s instead of getting all the D’s

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(pre-election 2016) Trump Hating Comedian at seedy East L.A. comedy club -

"Hey how "bout that Donald Trump chump… what the f@ck up with that dude, man?

“Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!” ( leap week, muthafukas!)

... "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit that’s

My mom said that being straight is good but if your straight how do you walk so i decided to be gay

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult?as?it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in?30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

Level 1 Feel it One Two Three Four Five Six Seven; end of level one

Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used.) 1 I couldn’t figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me. 2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall. 3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks. 4 It’s always windy in a sports arena. All those fans. 5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course! 6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve your type here.” 7 What’s the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler. 8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights

Question: What’s bald and is in a straight line?

Answer: The cancer ward

How do you turn get a straight guy into you a gay guy well… For starts you grab that ass of his drag him into the bathroom and tell him to suck my long big pineapple and thus you have yourself one straight guy converted into dick suckin machine

Me and my friend got in to a fight I look straight forward and said look me in my eyes