Q:How do you get a squirrle to like yopu A:Act like a nut??

Q:Why dont eggs tell jokes? A:Because they?d crack each other up

Son:Dad can you put my shoes on?Dad:No son i dont think they would fit me Im on a sea food diet when i see food i eat it

I used to hate facial hair but then it grew on me

Your mom is so fat when she swam in the sea Wales came up to her and said we are family even now you’re fatter than me.

A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders. As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, “I’ll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me

Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags „We have nuclear submarines which can stay under water for six weeks without having to resurface!“. Trump goes on „Six weeks? That’s nothing. I have the best submarines, they‘re underwater fur at least three months!“. Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears — „Heil Hitler! We need Diesel.“

How does the sea say hello It WAVES you SEA what I did their I’m SHORE you saw it Don’t be SALTY