Best Jokes
27 April: Top today:
What do you call Steven Hawkins on fire
Hot wheels
| Fire jokes |
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If a computer was an apartment, the only passage would be the windows. It would have had doors but why was it ever spelt DOS
| Computer jokes |
A d v e r t i s e m e n t:
27 April: Life jokes:
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack
I always hit on 16, the get busted
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27 April: Family jokes:
My daughter has gotten to the age where she asks me embarrassing questions about sex. Just this morning she asked me “is that the best you can do?”
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My Daughter is Super Smart! She pours her own drinks on the floor
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27 April: Ex jokes:
I see too many of my ex’s there
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A d v e r t i s e m e n t:
27 April: Waiting jokes:
Sy’kyira: I can’t wait for the therapist to come.
Daina: Same, 30 minutes have passed … I also wonder what that loud sound is.
Sy’kyira: SAME!!! What does it sound like a woman suffering???
Daina: I know, right?
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27 April: Job jokes:
If you were to ask me, ‘What is the easiest job in the world?’, it would be an Australian psychiatrist. “G’Day, G’Day…how you doing…no worries, next!”.
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John: hi boss it is raining heavily today so I would not be coming
Boss: u stated in ur job application that swimming was it hobby so see u at at 11am
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27 April: Game jokes:
A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, ‘This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for?300 as long as you can say it in three words.’ The guy replies, ‘Hey, why not?’ He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays? 300 on the bar, and says slowly. ‘Paint…my….house.’
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Why was the orphan confused at the baseball game? They kept yelling go home.
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A d v e r t i s e m e n t:
27 April: Woman jokes:
A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands for money.
Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, “Did you see me rob this bank?”
The man replied, “Yes sir, I did.”
The robber shot him in the head, killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, “Did you see me rob this bank? ”
The man replied, “No sir, I didn’t, but my wife did!”
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27 April: Nut jokes:
Was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner. I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked,“If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?”
%%“Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?” I asked.
“No, I don’t waste time fishing,” the homeless man said…“I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.”
“Will you spend this on hunting equipment?” I asked.
“Are you NUTS!” replied the homeless man. “I haven’t gone hunting in 20 years!”
“Well,” I said, “I’m not going to give you money. Instead, I’m going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife.”
The homeless man was astounded. "Won’t your wife be furious with you for doing that?
I replied, “Don’t worry about that. It’s important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting.”
Not a joke but still dc
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27 April: Dark Humor:
What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person?
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
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Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?..
He has no legs…
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Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.
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