Hit jokes

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What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?” Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.

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Doctor : what makes you feel depressed? Me: I used to work at the word trade centre, before the plane hit. Doctor: a lot of people fell to pieces after that.

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So Johnny was in kindergarten and his teacher assigned him to learn the ABC’s so he goes home and ask his mom who’s cooking “Whats the first letter of the ABC’s?” he ask and his mom responds with “SHUT UP… I’M COOKING!” so then he walks to sister who’s signing in the shower and asks her “Whats the 2nd letter of the ABC’s?” she responds with “I’m ready

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If you ever get Mad, just hit an orphan What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

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Whole reason he is dead is because he kept hitting ‘Remind me later’ on his Windows Updates. When you going 80 mph and hit a speed bump Then the speed bump starts screaming

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what is the difference between a baby and a watermelon, one smashes open when you hit it with a sledge hammer and the other is a water melon Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t, I hit it with my car 3 blocks down

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Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver

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What happened to the blind man’s son. He thought he was hitting a pinyata.

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