Fight jokes

Why can’t skeletons fight? They don’t have the guts

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What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?

“oh my God, you’re such a beach”

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When you have to fight an emo kid but he brings his friends so you gotta fight the suicide squad. But you gotta get da bois to help you

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When ur fighting with the emo kid and he brings his friends. Now u gotta fight the suicide squd

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So Jesus has been nailed to the cross. On the first day, he starts to moan, “Peter, Peter”.

Well, Peter hears Jesus moaning and feels it is important, so begins to go up the hill. On his way, he is met by some Roman soldiers and they proceed to beat his ass back down the hill.

On the second day, Peter hears Jesus moaning again, “Peter, Peter”.

Peter thinks to himself, this is important. He heads up the hill, fights past the first line, but gets a beatdown by the second group and back down the hill he goes.

On the third day, Peter is woken up by Jesus sounding very weak, but calling out, “Peter, Peter”.

Peter feels that whatever it is that Jesus needs him for, must be very important. Peter heads up the hill, he is on a mission. He manages to fight his way thru three sets of Roman guards and make his way to the cross Jesus has been nailed to for three days. He looks up to Jesus, and says “Jesus, I have heard your calls, what is so important”?

Jesus- “Peter, I can see your house from here”.

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How did Stephen hawking die. He lost a water gun fight

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What did the blind man fight in the bar?

The coat rack

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Bob Ross fighting in Vietnam. “The’re in the happy little trees, shoot the happy little trees and bushes.”

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Why did the dog cause the fight

Because it was a bulldog

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Why shouldn’t you get in a fight with a dinosaur

You’ll get jur ass kicked

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I’m just gonna say it. And don’t get offended but I’m so sick of the media bieng on the female side. It never shows what life is like for a male.

Yes women do have it hard in life because they have to give birth etc.

But men have it pretty hard too if not harder. Males are criticised for showing emotions.

Men have to go to war on the front lines.

Boys

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If an illegal immigrant fights against a child molester, would that be “Alien vs Predator”?

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If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?

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Why were condoms invented, so gay guys can have sword fights.

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Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? – Because the octopus was well armed.

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