Puns jokes

So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world

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Two artists had an art contest. – It ended in a draw.

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Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak

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What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel? It is ground breaking!

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Hear about the restaurant called karma? There is no menu: You get what you deserve

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I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

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What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? – A waist of time.

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How do trees get online? – They just log in.

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There was a kidnapping at school… Don?t worry, he woke up.

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I’ve never worn my gay sweater, it hasn’t come out of the closet yet

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I Googled “How to start a Wildfire”. I got 48,500 matches.

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Why did the picture go to jail? Cause it was framed!

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I once ate a watch. It was time consuming.

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I accidentally drank a little food colouring last night. I ended up dying inside.

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Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender? A: Nothing! He was hung over. My sister thinks shes so smart, shes said onions are the only food that makes you cry So I threw a coconut at her

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