What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

Where’s my tractor?

I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again but if life is a labyrinth, I’d always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favourite…

I tried to find my watch I lost last week but I didn’t have the time

One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!

My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair

Guess who came crawling back