What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Stop and apply lubrication.

When I was a kid I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.

My girlfriend called me a pedophile but what does she know, She’s 7

A: Whats the similarity between your girlfriend and the Sun?

B: They’re both hot?

A: They’re both massive.