Why did the painting go to jail? Because it was framed!

What’s the difference between a painting and jesus?

A painting only needs one nail.

A father and a son were painting pictures together, the son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T and the son said “what happened to your hand?” looking at the scar tissue near the father’s knuckle, the father replied with “you know what happened, you were there.” the son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings — they’re exactly the same.

The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there’s only one painting.

Two kids walked into a bar, they were covered with blood. the bartender asked what happened. The youngest said “Well, we we’re trying to paint our basement but we threw the babies too hard”.