What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?

The teacher says, “Spit out your gum,” but a train says, “Chew chew!”

Why are dolphins so smart? Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!

What do need in order to crash a train?

A bad track record

To become a licensed, airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.