Best Jokes

9 May: Top today:

If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered suislide?

Asking for a friend.

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High jokes
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Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 14.

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Hit jokes
9 May: Green jokes:

What’s green and smells like ham.

Kermit the frogs fingers

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Whats green and sticky? … a stick.

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What do you call a green camel.

My parents left me.

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9 May: Sea jokes:

What can fly underwater:A mosquito in a submerine

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9 May: What’s the difference?:

What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? – A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.

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What’s the difference between England and a tea bag? – The tea bag stays longer in a cup.

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What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon, one smashes open when you hit it with a sledge hammer and the other is a water melon

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9 May: Job jokes:

A man goes into a job interview and sits down. The interviewer is looking over his resume and says, "I see here that there’s a 4-year gap on your resume. What were you doing?" The man says, "Oh, that was when I went to Yale!" The interviewer is impressed and says, "That’s great! You’re hired! " The man smiles. “Really? I’m so glad, because I really need this Yob.”

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9 May: Dark Humor:

I woke up this morning thinking it was gonna be a great day. But then I realized I was still alive.

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What fell down the tree first the emo or the apple

Guess what the apple because the emo got left hanging

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I wish i could be as visible as my depression is.

My future is so bright, i need a flashlight to see where i’m going

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9 May: Puns jokes:

You know why I don’t buy Velcro items anymore?

They are a total rip off.

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Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me, it means a lot.

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I’m the champion of this site I fight with the ten rings and ten fists of the legendary buddah.

Now for my joke… Why does Peter pan always fly? Because he neverlands…

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9 May: Woman jokes:

Girlfriend: am I pretty or ugly?

Boyfriend: your both!

Girlfriend: what do you mean by that?

Boyfriend: your pretty ugly!!!

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9 May: Game jokes:

What is the most popular game at the orphanage?

Need For Speed MOST Wanted.

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Why was the orphan confused at the baseball game? They kept yelling go home.

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9 May: Poor jokes:

Yo mamas so poor the ducks through bread at her

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I know this is a really bad poem but I’ll do it anyway cuz I have nothing else to do.

Twas so pretty a night, with people all asleep. Everyone’s dreaming of that candy apple treat, and a palace. But alas! No it’s all a dream. Even eating ice cream, it’s all a dream! Why can’t I have this? Why can’t I have that? BUT NO! It’s just hitting you like a bat. YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE IT, you say to yourself. All for me, all for me, and exedra. it goes on and on. But why wish for riches? Your already rich enough? If you have a device, then take my advise, if you were poor you would have spent the money on food, like honey, not something that… OF ALL THINGS IS GOOGLE!

Like I said, it’s really bad.:(

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