Best Jokes
Thot Whore Asshole Horrible Horena (my ex gf)
| Ex jokes |
| Transport jokes |
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Did you fall from heaven? or did you fall from the cliff up there?
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I remember my moms last words before her divorce, did you just load in me.
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Q:What was hellen kellers favorite game as a kid A:musical chairs
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A man ordered a washing machine because his old one stopped working. As soon as the man opened his new washing machine, he immediately rejoiced because there was a woman inside. Without hesitation the man yelled. FREE DISHWASHER!
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My girlfriend’s dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, “What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?”
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I was once caught doing it with a 16 year old in my bedroom. Boy was my wife mad. She yelled “HOW CAN YOU F… OUR DAUGHTER?!”. Haha yeah she was mad. Anyways thats why your mother and I are getting a divorce Timmy.
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Sometimes i feel ugly, then i think of my sister and feel better
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Michael Jakson gets really ill so he’s rushed to hospital. When they get there he says ‘am i in heaven?’ The doctor replies ‘Nah sir we’re just taking a quick shortcut through the children’s ward.’
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Two men are in a rainforest and one of them is peeing. Suddenly a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s penis. The other man says, “ Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!”. He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out. The man wen back to the other man and said, “ There is no hope, you will die.”
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What’s Thanos’ favorite game? Half-life
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What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire (A tire as in clothes and the tire? U get it? no? I’m lonely. add me on Xbox: DECIMUS PAX)
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Why did the loo roll roll down the stairs — to get to the bottom What do you call a bear with no teeth — a gummy bear! !!
What’s wite and black and red allover? A nun that fell down stairs
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That one person who can never bring a smile to your face…
Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.
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On the inside of a fire hydrant you’ll find H2O. What’s on the outside? K9P
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Whats the difference between a bear with a gun and an American Man with a gun?
The bear has common sense not to fire it
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