3 Drunk men get in a taxi, the driver knew they were drunk so he started the car and turned it off. the first man gave him the money, the second man thanked him but the third man slapped the driver, the driver surprised that he noticed so he askes why and the third man replies with? why did you drive so fast.?
Friened says, "your so drunk last night, u throu a mushroom at a migit and said grow mario grow.
We are drunk at the party, there was an A S S ton of drunk girls there with me…
Little johnny dad was drunk and told him to grow up and he sad stfu you need to be young you big ass bitch
What would Stephen Hawking do to get drunk Over charge himself
You know what they say about dark humor: it hits harder than a drunk parent
What the difference between an Irish wedding and a Irish funeral, one less drunk.
My Countryhumans OC, Sahara, is the daughter of France and Soviet. When people ask why, I tell them it was the gendersnapped version of my parents making me. France (my dad) was drunk and Soviet (my mom) was being horny. Then they judge me, so I judge them with a knife to the chest 47 times.
Man drinks beer jumps off a tower and he’s okay the other guy says Whoa how’d you do that.he does it again so the guy gets a beer the same beer and jumps off he died.the bartender looks at the original man who jumped off and says Superman you’re a real butthole whenever you’re drunk
What do you call a drunk depressed man that skydives?
Splattered.
Superman was bored and wanted to go out, he called all his super friends but they were all busy. He even calls Louis but it’s her time of the month. He flies to the liquor store and buy some beer and gets drunk. As has flying he sees wonder woman naked on top of the roof, he starts thinking "I will fly down…and have sex with her sooooo fast “BURP” that she WON’T know what happen. "HICKUP" He flies to her faster than a speed of light BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG and flies away with a smile he passes out and crashed into a wall. Wonder woman jumps up and screams "WHAT WAS THAT… the invisible man appears holding his butt and he gets off on wonder woman and says ‘I dont know but my butt hurts real bad’.
So I had an idea: you and a friend go bar (pub (whatever you call it)) hopping and propose to said friend in each htm title=' you get drunk and have a great time'>one so everyone buys you free drinks and you get drunk and have a great time
Some guy was mad at his ex wife! so he threw a bottle of alcohol into her house when he was drunk. And realized when he was being questioned for arson, his cigarette was in the rim of the bottle.
So my dad was drinking so he was drunk and I was sad?? but can you be my friend pls
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign? A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
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