One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, “OH! THE HUMANATEE!”
My Xbox has been acting up lately…
So I painted it black to make it run faster
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? 327
How many babies does it take to paint a wall
Depends how hatd you throw them
One Tuesday afternoon Little Jonny Decides he wants extra Homework So he went to his teacher and said,Hello can I have extra homework this week and the teacher replied with,Sure be at my house Friday afternoon to cut my lawn, Polish the counters,Scrub the Baseboards,Scrub and paint the walls! And johnny replied with,That’s not what I Ment but at least I’ll get paid! And The Teacher said, How about 200 each job? Johnny replied with,OK (Friday afternoon at her house After Johnny Does all the jobs he asked for his payment and the teacher laughed and said, You do know that Tuesday was April fools day right?
What did the two paintings say after a long battle? Lets call this one a draw
My young son saw trump on TV he asked “Why is the man on TV painted orange?” I replied “Son when Russia pays that much for equipment, They don’t want it to rust”
Why did the painting go to jail? Because it was framed!
How fast did Little Sally paint the barn red? As soon as the bomb exploded on her.
R u a toaster? cuz i wanna take a bath wit u r u a knife? cuz u make me wanna kms r u a painting? cuz i hang u r u the flu? cuz u make me wanna hurl r u a newspaper? cuz u have new problems everyday r u the ground? cuz im six feet deep in u ;)
What’s the difference between a painting and jesus?
A painting only needs one nail.
A father and a son were painting pictures together, the son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T and the son said “what happened to your hand?” looking at the scar tissue near the father’s knuckle, the father replied with “you know what happened, you were there.” the son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings — they’re exactly the same.
The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there’s only one painting.
Always practice safe sex: paint an x on the sheep that kick.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them
"…This morning, I came out my front door to see my neighbor frantically trying to scrub off the word “PEDO” that had been spray-painted on his front window.
“What’s been going on John? ”’ I asked. “f@cking kids,” came his mumbled reply. The dirty bastard!’
“f@cking kids,” came his mumbled reply.
The dirty bastard!’
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