Sea jokes

Why did the ocean break up with the pond?

Because the pond was to shallow

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I tried a pun about water but people “sea” right through it, and when people complain they are usually just being a beach

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

Why did the sea cry? Because it felt salty and blue

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I was going to tell a joke about emos in the sea but it’s dead in the water

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why can’t blind people have a sea food diet?

They have to see the food to eat

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why can’t blind people eat fish?

Because it’s sea food.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What is the weirdest thing to wear and what is weirdest thing to say. Weirdest thing to ware: Socks with sandals, also with flip flops! Weirdest thing to say: “Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?” “The blue angel sea slug looks like an alien.” (weird). Bonus: Things to ware with other things: Crop top with t-shirt(really hip), Crop top with tights or shorts, dresses with tights! (Cool) Oh well byeeeeeee!

All these sea monster jokes are just Kraken me up.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why does it take sooo long for the pirates to learn the alphabet? Because they spend years on c pirate: a b sea?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

I’m on sea- food diet, I see food and eat it.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over a bay, they would be bagels.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay they would be called bagels.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags „We have nuclear submarines which can stay under water for six weeks without having to resurface!“. Trump goes on „Six weeks? That’s nothing. I have the best submarines, they‘re underwater fur at least three months!“. Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears — „Heil Hitler! We need Diesel.“

How does the sea say hello It WAVES you SEA what I did their I’m SHORE you saw it Don’t be SALTY

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Fishing and girlfriends are exactly alike, there may be plenty of fish in the sea, but until i find one, i’m stuck here holding my rod

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What is the strongest creature in the sea?

A mussel!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2024