Smoking jokes

Why did the guy get the hose

Because the girl was smoking hot

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I asked my girlfriend if she was a smoke alarm she said “ is it because I warned him when hottness came” I said “ no, you don’t shut up

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

A bear and a rabbit are at a bar getting high smoking weed talking about nothing but lies and straight up garbage. and then the bear starts to drink too much damn liquor gets drunk and ask the rabbit can i have one more scotch pretty please? And the rabbit says hell to the naw I’m not about to carry your drunk ass home with me and smell your breath.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Three friends are in a hotel room in Soviet Russia. The first two men open a bottle of vodka, while the third is tired and goes straight to bed. He is unable to sleep however, as his increasingly drunk friends tell political jokes loudly.

After a while, the tired man gets frustrated and walks downstairs for a smoke. He stops in the lounge and asks the receptionist to bring tea to their room in five minutes.

The man walks back into the room, joins the table, leans towards a power outlet and speaks into it:

“Comrade major, we want some tea to room 62 please.”

His friends laugh on the joke, until there is a knock on the door. The receptionist brings a teapot. His friends fall silent and pale, horrified of what they just witnessed. The party is dead, and the man goes to sleep.

After a good night’s rest, the man wakes up, and notices his friends are gone. Surprised, he walks downstairs and asks the receptionist where they went.

The nervous receptionist whispers that KGB came and took them before dawn.

The man is horrified. He wonders why he was spared.

The receptionist responds:

“Well, comrade major did quite like your tea joke.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Cremation: My last hope for a smoking hot body.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

September 2020: Three makeup tutorialists, James Charles, Jeffree Star and Tati Westbrook has gone through smoke after the controversy surrounding the three of them. Honestly, Tati and Jeffree are trash, I just don’t find their content interesting, and I don’t watch James Charles, but I also dislike his content.

Ok heres ur funi jokeee

Who is the best makeup artist?

Just because Jeffree has Star at the end doesn’t mean he is best

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?

A baked potato.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call a guy in a wheelchair smoking weed?

A baked potato

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Stop and apply lubrication.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Don’t Touch My Truck-By: Breland and Sam Hunt

You can drink my liquor You can call my lady You can take my money You can smoke my blunt Scuff these Jordans You can say you hate me You can call me crazy, but Don’t touch my truck (skrrt, skrrt) Skrrt (yeah, yeah) Skrrt Don’t touch my truck (brrp, yeah) Skrrt (woo-oh) Skrrt Don’t touch my V8 engine

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

When you put the chicken in the oven and it goes down and the oven explodes oven and smoke and everything is fire and on fire and flies to the grass and all goes back

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I would like to remind all passengers that this is a no-smoking flight, although do feel free to join me in the cockpit, where we’ve opened a window.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do you call a fish that smokes? “A puffer.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Ya know I’m not to I to black girls, but Kobe’s daughter was smoking!!!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Yo mama so stupid she though seaweed was something fish smoke

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2024