Computer jokes

Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.”

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What did Stephen hawkings computer say when he died ?? … ERROR

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There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?

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I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he wrist in peach.

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Why can’t Orphans have a computer? They don’t have a home page.

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Don’t fart in a Apple Store It has no Windows

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The emo was having computer problems because they had troubleshooting

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Yo mama so dumb that when she saw the “log in” page on her computer she went and put a log in it.

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Why is Steven Hawkins arrested? The police used computer GPS

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A man walks into a library and says to the librarian, “Do you have that book for men with small penises?” The librarian looks on her computer and says, “I don’t know if it’s in yet.” “Yeah, that’s the one!”

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One apple a day keeps the doctor away, not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.

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How did the inkjet printer kill himself? He drank cyan-ide.

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What is the difference between an American and a computer? An American doesn’t have trouble shooting

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Why was Stephen Hawking never trusted when taking a quiz. “No computers allowed on the test”

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My wife told me she’ll slam my head on the keyboard if I don’t get off the computer. I’m not too worried, I think she’s jokinlkjhfakljn m, .nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf…ftysrrtfgbjysou34w45pjr578v

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