What did the processor say when it was being overclocked? “Stop it! It hertz so much!”
There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?
Q. What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? A. “I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions.”
Window Problems A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won’t open." Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer. " Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now.”
What do computer programming and 9/11 have in common? They’re both inside jobs.
What’s one thing orphans don’t have on their computer? A home page.
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.”
Why are elephants scared of computers? Because of the mouse. I’d make a joke about epilepsy but the computer started flashing
Why can’t orphans build computers? They don’t know where to put the motherboard
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime? I think they just hacked the chrime
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he wrist in peach.
Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married? Because they had a connection
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “dos, 1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 8.1, 10.”
whats the difference between a white kid and a computer? the child has no trouble shooting
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