Computer jokes

Don’t fart in a Apple Store It has no Windows

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One apple a day keeps the doctor away, not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.

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The other day my Computer crashed. Luckily there were no injuries.

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There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?

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What’s a aliens favorite computer key? the space bar!

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One day a computer said to another computer, "Why are you so dumb." The other computer replied, “Because I have low memory.”

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why is stephen hawking an organ donator? because he saved 200 computers.

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whats the difference between a white kid and a computer? the child has no trouble shooting

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My wife told me she’ll slam my head on the keyboard if I don’t get off the computer. I’m not too worried, I think she’s jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf

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Some people are like a software update. When I see them I think, “Not now.” What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human? Ask Boeing.

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whats the difference between paul walker and a computer? i give a f@ck if my computer crashes

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Why was the Computer late to work? Coz it had a hard drive… LMAO

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Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10. He replied, “I still love Vista, baby”.

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What did the processor say when it was being overclocked? “Stop it! It hertz so much!”

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What part is usually missing in an orphan’s computer system? Motherboard.

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