Computer jokes

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A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT

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A man was walking down the street with a swivel chair under one arm, a computer under the other and a desk strapped to his back. A policeman ran over to him and handcuffed him, saying “I’m arresting you for impersonating an office, sir”

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whats do computers and white kids have in common? They don’t have trouble shooting

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Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “dos, 1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 8.1, 10.”

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There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?

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Some people are like a software update. When I see them I think, “Not now.” What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human? Ask Boeing.

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One apple a day keeps the doctor away, not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.

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You must have a good power supply, because you’re easy to turn on!

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