Boys: “Hey, can billy come out and play baseball?” Mom: “That’s not funny, you know billy doesn’t have any arms and legs” Boys: “I know, we need a third base”
I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad’s half sister.
All my jokes are cys for help INCLUDING THIS ONE
I’ll never forget my Grandads last words…SON WHERE DID U GET A GRENADE FROM?!
I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself
I know Im valuable, I come with a barcode ;)
I can barely remember the last words my uncle told me let go of my nose
What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie won shu
Once I saw A girl crying and asked where are your parents; God I love working at orphanages.
What do you come a dog with no legs? It don’t matter what you it, cause it ain’t gonna come to you.
I still remember my granpas last words: turn the lawn mower off!
if you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that’s self-harm. If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that’s acting. it isn’t any of those if it’s suicide.
why does a movie set say break a leg? because they have a CAST
They say people are 75% water But I’m 100% useless
Yo mamma is so ugly she made blind kids cry
RUS | ENG