Dark Humor

Other girls be like “I want a 6ft guy”, meanwhile I want to be 6ft under ????

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What do you call a dog with no legs? – Doesn’t matter what you call him, he’s not coming.

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A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?” He responded with, “The cat is dead.” She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you’ve broken the new slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor things dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?” “She’s playing on the roof.”

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I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging

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I fear my last words will be ‘‘hold my beer and watch this.’’

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knock knock whos their boo boo who well you dont have to cry about it gary

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So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree To bad he left him hanging

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Kids are so ungrateful sometimes. I bought a wheelchair for my son, Did he say thank you? Nope! That mtf just sat in his wheelchair the whole time crying the whole day.??

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if you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that’s self-harm. If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that’s acting. it isn’t any of those if it’s suicide.

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Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.

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Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?.. He has no legs…

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I was crying when Sasha died in AOT, i also got jealous.