Dark Humor

What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.

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What’s the difference between a onion and a viola? No one cries when they cut up the viola

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Wanna hear some famous last words? “We are just experiencing some turbulence”

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Why do we tell actors to “break a leg”? Because every scene has a cast!

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I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn’t working, my wife started crying. Knock knock Who’s there Insomnia You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can "t cry myself to sleep anymore…

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To whoever has my voodoo doll, please hold its hand.

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Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!

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