Dark Humor

Life is like a penis simple,soft,relaxed,and hanging free.until a woman comes around and makes it hard

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You can’t YEE your last H A W! but I put my BALLS in ur JAW.

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A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”

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One day, he started crying out of nowhere. Everyone started crying with him. There was a crying pandemic going around.

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Little Johnny’s mom is taking a shower little Johnny walks in and asks what is that in between your legs mommy says that is my keyhole the next day little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and little Johnny asks what is that in between your legs daddy says that is my key the next day little Johnny says to his dad looks like the neighbor has the key to mommy’s keyhole too. By:Xzavier

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When the people that see u Cry that doesn’t mean they miss u That mean they scared of yo Onion breath????

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Denki- hey mineta i have a joke Mineta- …go on… Denki- Ochakos booty Mineta- i dont get it? Denki- exactly Mineta- cries T_T

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It’s ironic that the more other people love you the more you hate yourself.

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What’s the hardest line to draw in a hospital? * … A FLATLINE!

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I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The f@ck you doing whit that knife

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What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.

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I fear my last words will be ‘‘hold my beer and watch this.’’

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There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunk, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said “i farted and the building behind me blew up”.

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What was stephan Hawkins last words\windows10shutting down

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Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it

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