Dark Humor

I remember my uncles last words: “I don’t think were going shooting today.”

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Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!

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Why did i walk across the road? to get hit by a car

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Gambler A guy walks into a butcher’s shop and says "Sir, are you a gambling man?" The butcher says, “Why yes, as a matter of fact I am.” "Then I’ll bet you $25 you can’t reach up and touch that meat hanging over your head right there." The butcher thinks for a moment and says, "I’m sorry, I won’t take that bet." The guy says, “But I thought you said you were a gambling man. ” “I am. But the steaks are too high.”

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What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”

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What’s the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him ? It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

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What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person? If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.

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My grandfather said we rely on technology too much so I unplugged his life support. Luckily I remember his last words . “You little bastard!”

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