Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!
Grandpa’s last words,why do you have a chain saw
I started crying when my mom was cutting up onions Onions was a good dog
I wish my hair was depressed Cause then it would cut itself
You must be depression, because you make me want to kill myself ;)
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you f@ck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR f@ckED NOW
I still remember my granpas last words: turn the lawn mower off!
I still remember my grandpas last words stop wobbling the ladder you cunt
I still remember my grandpas last words Stop shaking the damn ladder
I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn’t working, my wife started crying. Knock knock Who’s there Insomnia You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can "t cry myself to sleep anymore…
What’s the hardest line to draw in a hospital? * … A FLATLINE!
what do depressed people and Apple’s have in common? they both hang from trees
I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn’t you drug her again so she would forget?
i have no friends but then i realize my true friends are anxiety and depression
My memes are ironic but my depression is chronic.
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