You should never leave a man hanging. Unless they are still alive…
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
my advice to suicidal people: just hang in there ??
A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”
Friend #1: “Whats your favourite thing about trees?” Friend #2: “Apples” Me: “I can hang myself in them.”
What was Steven Hawking’s last words? ERROR 101
There’s nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
Who needs April fools… When your whole life is a joke?
What do you call a pig with no legs? A groundhog.
If you watch " jaws" backward it will be a heartwarming story about a shark who giving arms and legs to disable people
I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself
I’ve looked everywhere… I just can’t seem to find where I left my will to live
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea. Bonus joke: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea.
What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning and his dad was making alot of mistakes. Suddenly his dad screams " bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant and his dad replied " aunts and uncles" Oh. next thing he hears is “dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks " what’s that mean?" To which his dad replied " uh coats and hats." Oh next thing he know he sees his dad jumping around the the bathroom yelling " f@cking, f@ck,f@ck,f@ck" " what does that mean dad?" And his dad yells " cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh. Next week is Thanksgiving and the doorbell rings and Johnny answers it and says " Hey bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, dad’s in the kitchen f@cking the turkey.
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