I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
How do you make a builder cry? Kill his family
A emo texted a tree wanna hang out… The tree ghosted her
When its been halloween for a few months but there’s still a body hanging from your neighbours tree
What do you call a prostitute with no arm or legs Cash and carry
Is Depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle
what do you call a dog with no legs? It don’t matter what you call it. It ain’t coming.
I can barely remember the last words my uncle told me let go of my nose
What does my head and hell have in common? They both have demons in them
There’s nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
Me having a good day Going on a walk on a peaceful day* my depression: hey whats up! Me: go away. My depression: well how rude. Me: ??. My depression: remeber that one tim… Me: no, dont even. My depression: that we… Me: nope. My deprssion: says really fast:said that one stupid joke that wasnt funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilt water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like yoy do every single night. Me: ??????. My depression: ?? dont worry I’ll always be here for you.
Are you depression "cause you’re always on my mind~ 1273 depression got the best of me, i’m gonna cry in my room now
why arent emos n trees friends? cus the tree leaves them hanging
what do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn’t matter whutcha call him he ain’t comin’
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