I don’t call it suicide. I call it population control
I can’t hang out with a emo when they are sad? Why? Because it cuts deeply
Depression is like therapy the more you see it the more you get used to it
I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The f@ck you doing whit that knife
I remember my uncles last words: “I don’t think were going shooting today.”
A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage why was she crying before she went in Because the people came back for their dog
My grandfather said we rely on technology too much so I unplugged his life support. Luckily I remember his last words. “You little bastard!”
According to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly, it wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don’t care about what humans think is impossible, Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black
Emo kids counting be like: 1,2,3 come hang with me! 4,5,6 Gonna get new slits! 7,8,9 Suicide! 10,11,12 Bring some pills!
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope…
Friend 1:Eyyy gurl Me:Hey! (Fake smile) Friend 2:hey g-guys what "bout we play would you rather? 6 hours later Friend 2:So (name) would u rather? 1.“Hang” out with me Or 2.“Jump” 1 times? Me…e-eh?..Why not both???we could just "Jump while “Hanging” out right?
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…?
The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.
911 what’s your emergency Me, my grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she’s dead Well it’s not a living room any more Me, hangs up
Whats worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree? 1 dead baby hanging of 1000 trees
Me having a good day Going on a walk on a peaceful day* my depression: hey whats up! Me: go away. My depression: well how rude. Me:??. My depression: remeber that one tim… Me: no, dont even. My depression: that we… Me: nope. My deprssion: says really fast:said that one stupid joke that wasnt funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilt water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like yoy do every single night. Me:???. My depression:?? dont worry I’ll always be here for you.
What do you call a prostitute with no arm or legs
Cash and carry
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