Me: Knock knock…Friend: who’s there? Me: I don’t know anymore
What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang
why does a movie set say break a leg? because they have a CAST
I still remember my grandpas last words stop wobbling the ladder you cunt
friend: hey,wanna play hid and seek? me:sure, i’ve got a great spot! me: grabs nuce and runs to my closet
Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire
Why didnt Logan Paul high five the asain man…because he loves to leave asains hanging
You’d think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no… oh no he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.
i went to a butcher house with my little cousin and seen a baby pig and told her look its pepa pig she started crying
Kids are so ungrateful sometimes. I bought a wheelchair for my son, Did he say thank you? Nope! That mtf just sat in his wheelchair the whole time crying the whole day.??
What made me laugh? The fact that my life is a joke:")
You know people always say your life is worth it, but with me it’s worth-it-less
Little Johnny’s mom is taking a shower little Johnny walks in and asks what is that in between your legs mommy says that is my keyhole the next day little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and little Johnny asks what is that in between your legs daddy says that is my key the next day little Johnny says to his dad looks like the neighbor has the key to mommy’s keyhole too. By:Xzavier
Ill never forget my mother last words. What’s are doing with that sledge hammer i will never forget my girlfriends last words…"get off of me STOP"slurp…Dead
What’s the difference between a baby and an onion ? One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.
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