What the difference between an Irish wedding and a Irish funeral, one less drunk.
Whats the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? – The hockey player showers after 3 periods.
A Blonde walks into a hospital claiming that everywhere she touches hurts. So she goes into the examination room and the doctor says “Okay I’d like you to point to wherever it hurts”. So the Blonde pokes her cheek and says “Here. Ow.” She then pokes her arm and says “Here. Ow.” She then repeats this with different parts of her body until the doctor finally says that she should stop. The doctor say “I know what’s happened to you.” “What’s happened to me??” The Blonde says, concerned. The doctor simply replies, “You have a broken finger.”
Whats the difference between a dead baby in a dumpster and a treasure chest? It’s a suprise when you find the treasure
“Why did Susie fall off the swing?” “Because she had no arms” “Why could she get up off the ground?” “Because she had no friends” “Knock knock” “Who’s there?” “Not Susie, she’s still on the ground” “Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?” “Everywhere” “Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?” “Because it was in a different body bag” “Why did Susie drop her ice cream?” “She was hit by a bus” “Why did Susie fall off the swing? ” “Someone threw a refrigerator at her”
What’s the difference betwen a alligator and a crocrodile? One of them you’ll see in a while and the other one you’ll se later
People are like potatoes. We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.
Roast: What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One is hairy and smells like fish and the other is a walrus. Your welcome What is the difference between a Catholic priest and Acne? – Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
What’s the difference between a hamster and a cigarette? They’re both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire
What’s the difference between an ISIS training center and a school?? I don’t know, I just fly the drone
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is a refreshing summertime snack the other one is a watermelon.
What’s the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile? One is Catholic
What’s the difference between a amateur thief and a professional thief? The amateur thief says, "Give me all your money!" The professional thief says, “Sign here please.”
What’s the difference between princess Dianna and Thomas the tank engine Thomas came out the other end of the tunnel
What is the difference between a coconut and your ex? One is fun to knock down by throwing rocks at the other one is a coconut.
RUS | ENG
