What’s the difference?

Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby.

One makes you cry when you cut it up

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Whats the difference between a cat and a bannana, its hard to peel a cat

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What’s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator The fridge dont fart when you take your meat out

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What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…?

The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.

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Whats the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? – The hockey player showers after 3 periods.

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What do turtles and lesbians have in common they both choke on plastic

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You wanna know what’s the difference between a girl and a refrigerator? “a refrigerator doesn’t moan when I put my meat in it”

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Q: What’s the difference between me and cancer? A: My dad didn’t beat cancer…

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What’s the difference between a school and a isis military base? Don’t ask me I only fly the drone…

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What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?

The tea bag stays in the cup longer.

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Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don’t have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan: he tells his friend “We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks but then when the bill comes you get down and suck on the hot-dog and it’ll look like you’re sucking on my dick so then we’ll get thrown out without paying and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again”. His friend agrees so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude’s pants, go to the bar and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, “Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!” The first guy says “Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!”

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What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?

I don’t put fruit in a blender.

Whats the difference between Stephen Hawking an a walkie talkie? Stephen cant walkie an stephen cant talkie

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What’s the difference between a hamster and a cigarette? They’re both harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

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There is thin line between death and life!! You won’t live to see it …

The Cardiogram will!!

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What the difference between a feminist and Hitler?

Both were good at starting wars, only difference was Hitler knew when to kill himself afterwards.

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