Ex: baby i miss u me: sorry i cant talk im at a funeral Ex: who died?! me: my feelings 4 u bitch
I love breakups, my ex-girlfriends always end up in pieces.
the last thing i told my ex after we broke up was “at least we’re still cousins”??
My ex got hit by a bus yesterday.i nearly lost my job
Girlfriend: you remind me of a cellphone Ex Boyfriend: how and why? Girlfriend: Because your about to die
I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday…lets just say i quit my job as a butcher
My ex died today. I also lost my job as a butcher
I was hunting at night for deer and then I found one and shot it, I realized the deer I shot was actually my ex…
I lost my drivers license today i hit my ex with my car
Roses are red violets are blue were breaking up because I never love you
I have an exam next week so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips
So 3 guys are walking down the street together and decide to go rob a bank. The first one goes for the richest man in the city’s vault but can’t open it easily, and is caught and sent to death in jail for robbing the richest man. The second one goes for his uncles vault because screw that son of a bh he’s rich why does he need all the money. But his uncle was unfortunately at the vault that day and snapped his nephews neck. The third one went for his ex’s vault and thought “well that bh can suck my dk she’s so poor anyway who would care if I take all her money so she dies of hunger and dehydration and homelessness” so he managed to get into her vault easily because it wasn’t heavily locked and took all her money. The next day the third guys ex showed up to his house and said “imma fg murder you” so she shot him dead and got her money from his house. In hell the three guys see each other and explain what happened. The third guy did and then asked “you know I don’t get it. If the richest guys are heavily guarded but already have so much money in their house why does it need to be heavily guarded? I don’t understand why the poorer aren’t heavily guarded when they are so poor they need the money.” And the first guy said “bh I don’t know maybe the bank tellers think poor people should suck it and just die already”
What do you call a no r-med T-rex A T-ex
Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver
What do you call a cow with three legs? My ex
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