What did the snail say to his ex-wife? I’m still leaving you!
i just found out my ex got stabbed today…lets just say i lost my job as a butcher
What do you call someone who used to kill people? An ex-ecutioner.
I love breakups, my ex-girlfriends always end up in pieces.
“Hey today was great” “What happened” “I ran into my ex today” “What’s so great about that?” “I was in my car”
What did Pennywise become after LEAVING the circus? Ex-IT. (I capitalized important parts of the joke)
i got hit by a bus but the bus was my ex
A FED EX plane was carrying 375 fridges across Africa but the cargo door wasn’t shut properly but only 218 reached the desired destination. The rest landed in a remote village. How many fell out the plane? Time’s up! You took too long you only had 4 seconds to answer it. How do you put an elephant into the fridge that pushed out the cargo door? Open the fridge, put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe into the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant. Then put in the giraffe and close the door. Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she got hit by the other 156 refrigerators. How did she survive? Her idiot mother tried to pull her out and accidentally ripped both her arms off. But she was rescued 8 minutes later.
the last thing i told my ex after we broke up was “at least we’re still cousins”??
I was in a toxic relationship . After some time my girlfriend died, her name was happy . Still got no clue of her body and here i am lying on the bed so f@cking happy.
My Smoothie Ingredients -Bananas -Strawberry -The Blood of my ex -Peanut Butter Gf- You are a drug. Bf- Why cause you are addicted to me? Gf- No, because you are number one most wanted in Montana.
What do you call a no r-med T-rex A T-ex
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red? My ex wife. So my ex who wouldn’t leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though will has a better haircut then me but anyway when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat. Then I told her she has the wendys logo haircut and then some other things I’m not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit I was done Anyways she cried lol
My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.
It’s been a terrible day today my ex got hit by a bus and died. Not only this but the council cut my bus drivers permit
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