Q:Why did the father through butter out the window?A:he wanted to see a butterfly
Orphans always dip their Oreos in water? Hoping their dad comes back with the milk.
So Kenny finally found his one true love. But he can’t be with her because it’s illegal to marry your sister.
My Mom said: I have a daughter that killed herself for getting bullied. Well i said: Have you seen her?
I wont ever Forget my dads last words: “OH GOD THE POLICE!!!”
I named my daughter Kennedy so when I talked about how her brain was shot out of her head people just thought I paid really close attention in history.
I was once caught doing it with a 16 year old in my bedroom. Boy was my wife mad. She yelled “HOW CAN YOU F… OUR DAUGHTER?!”. Haha yeah she was mad. Anyways thats why your mother and I are getting a divorce Timmy.
There was a costume party on Halloween. Everyone was there except one guy. Many people asked his brother where he was. His reply was, “Oh, he wanted to be our dad for Halloween.”
Mother: Who do you like more, me or your dad. Liam: I like you both. Mother: Ok, if I go to america and your dad goes to paris, where will you go Liam: I will go to paris. Mother: That’s means you like dad more Liam: No, its because i like paris Mother: Ok, fine, if I go to paris and your dad goes to america, where will you go. Liam: I will go to America. Mother: Why Liam: Because I have already gone to paris.
Girl: How do you feel about abortion? Dad: Ask your sister Girl: I don’t have a …
My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.
I told my friend yesterday he’s literally my dad. He didn’t show up for the rest of the year.
my mom said take out the trash and i said okay. the next day she asked “where is your sister”, and i said in line to get crushed.
So my teacher’s daughter commited suicide. One day Ima go up to her and say “What’s wrong did Logan Paul leave your daughter hangin’”.
My dad is like my depression you need a suicide letter to find him
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