So a daughter goes to her dad and says “daddy can I borrow the car?” He the tells her “you know what to do”. So then she proceeds to suck him off, almost immediately pulls out in disgust and says “ugh tastes like shit” her dad then said “damn I forgot your brother took the car”
Dinosaurs are like my dad. I never got the see either of them and they are now extinct
Why does sally have a 100 sisters? She lives in a orphanage
If there is a divorce in West Virginia Are they still brother and Sister?
Daughter: Dad, what’s your opinion on abortions? Dad: Ask your sister Daughter: But I don’t have a sister Dad: Exactly
what is the diffrence between a snow woman and a snowman? Snowballs
You know whats the worst about having a daughter with cancer? You can’t pull her hair when you hit it from the back “Dad, how do stars die?” – “Usually an overdose.”
So I was in the car with my mom one time and we always joke about me being adopted (I am not) and Michael Jackson’s song Billie Jean sounds like my name and so my mom says, as the song is playing, (my name) is not my daughter, she’s just a girl who claims that I am her mum. Wow. applauds for mother Love you momma =)
What runs but never stop
roses are red violets are violets my dad died in 9/11 and he was a good piolet
jack and jill went up the hill to do it in the water. jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter
There once was a brother and a sister so one night it’s storming really bad and the sister goes into the brothers room and asks " can I stay with you tonight because I’m scared" the brother replies with " yea sure but just don’t tell Mom" so the girl climbs into the bed and looks under the sheets to see the boys penis and asks “what’s that?” And the boy replies with “that’s my pet snake” and the girl asks “can I pet it?” And the boy says “sure just don’t tell Mom” and the boy falls asleep and wakes up in a hospital and asks “what happened” and the girl said “I pet the snake but it spit on me so I bit it’s head off” My conversion therapy done worked. Now I only sleep with my sister and not my brother.
Why hasn’t my dad come back? No seriously I’m not joking
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack was surprised to see she had different eyes and that’s when he realized… Jack had f@cked Jill’s daughter
Teacher: People with Depression never get anywhere in life. Student 1: My mom has depression, but she died. Student 2: My sister has depression and she’s going to Therapy. Student 3: My Dad Has depression, and he’s Doing REALLY Well
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