Fight jokes

North Korea and the martians were fighting about who was going the reach venus first. Trump steps in and says " That doesn’t matter american is going to land on the sun first". The martians and North Korea said “you can’t land on the sun it’s to hot and you will die”. Trump said his brilliant plan that “America is going to land their at night”.

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so i saw two homeless people on the road fight i said stop fighting and go home i gess it was a little insensitive

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my girlfriend dumped me today apparently I don’t stand up for her in fights I don’t care she use to push me around all the time

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Best way to stop a fight between deaf people? Just turn off the Lights

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So there were kids in the bus and half of them were white and the other half was black, all the kids wanted to sit at the back so the bus driver said to all the kids stop fighting from now on everyone is now green, so the bus driver said to all the kids dark green go to the front and light green at the back.

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how do you get two deaf people from fighting? turn off the lights and walk out.

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I’m just gonna say it. And don’t get offended but I’m so sick of the media bieng on the female side. It never shows what life is like for a male. Yes women do have it hard in life because they have to give birth etc. But men have it pretty hard too if not harder. Males are criticised for showing emotions. Men have to go to war on the front lines. Boys have less

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When deaf people fight, they let their fists do the talking.

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Guy: Fight me on Xbox. Guy: oh right you don’t have one laughs Me: Fight me in real life. Me: Oh right you don’t have a real life. INSERTS APPLE BOTTOM JEANS 2021-2022

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Why couldnt proffessor xavier fight magneto? because he couldnt stand up for himself

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What’s the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight? When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren’t at a UFC event, you’re watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.

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Women be like men cause wars forgets men fight those wars while they fake cry

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My mom tells me and my sister to stop fighting mom! you and dad need to stop!

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I got in a cage fight the hampster dident cnow wat hit him

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I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sht was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He BNED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone. My dad and cancer go into a fight never saw my dad after that

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