Fight jokes

I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sht was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He BNED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone. My dad and cancer go into a fight never saw my dad after that

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

If an illegal immigrant fights against a child molester, would that be “Alien vs Predator”?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

North Korea and the martians were fighting about who was going the reach venus first. Trump steps in and says " That doesn’t matter american is going to land on the sun first". The martians and North Korea said “you can’t land on the sun it’s to hot and you will die”. Trump said his brilliant plan that “America is going to land their at night”.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I got into a fight with 1, 3, 5, 7 and 9. – The odds were against me.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Q: Why do clowns always get into fights? A:Because they have the balls to.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully of him. The cop then asked the bully, “Why are you beating him up?” I responded, saying "I fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease. Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, “Well, how did I do?”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

how do you get two deaf people from fighting? turn off the lights and walk out.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Two silk worms got in a fight. It ended in a tie.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why can’t skeletons fight? They don’t have the guts

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2025