Fire jokes

I was about to change my password to fire-fist ace… but apparently it was too weak.

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What do you call a red neck on fire. A fire cracker

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wood fired pizza? hows pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O please drop a like

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I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home there were signs everywhere

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On the inside of a fire hydrant you’ll find H2O. What’s on the outside? K9P

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My little cousin’s birthday was in a few days and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming “HOT WHEELS!”

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Michael Jackson was once a guitar teacher, but he got fired because he fingered a minor

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my friend committed suicide yesterday…at least he went out with a bang

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I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled hot wheels

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Chuck Norris uses elevators only in case of fire.

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I bought a gun from Walmart today. I guess they knew what I was going to do with it, because when I pulled the gun on the cashier, I realized the firing mechanism was in reverse.

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whats the difference between a bear with a gun and an American Man with a gun? The bear has common sense not to fire it

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The only thing brighter than my future is the fire on the world trade center.

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I love fire. My friends love it too. When i set them on fire, they run around and scream. They sometimes get so tired they immediately fall asleep forever. Also, they need a shower.

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I can’t believe I got fired at the calender factory. I mean… All I did was take a day off!

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