Fire jokes

There are some sounds that everyone loves… Shoes on gravel Crackling of fire The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you Cats purring

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

yo mama so stupid that she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W’s

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

My doctor told me that I had to burn calories, so I took a fat kid and lit them on fire

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb In the shape of an “L” on her forehead Well, the years start coming and they don’t stop coming Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running Didn’t make sense not to live for fun Your brain gets smart but your

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Chuck Norris uses elevators only in case of fire.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What does a cigarette and a hamster have in common? Both are completely harmless untill you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Are you a fire alarm because your loud and annoying

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, “okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want.” Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, “I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire.” Allyn said “what?” As he looked over at Jim.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail? A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

whats black and sits at the top of the stairs? stephen hawkings during a house fire.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Three unlucky jungle explorers were captured by a band of cannibals. Whilst being tied to three respective stakes, the chieftain announces that the hapless adventurers were about to die. “After you’re dead, you’ll be skinned. The skin will be used to increase our canoe armada, and the rest of you will be food for us and our families.” This announcement

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

i use to work at a calendar factory but i got fired because i missed a few days

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What do Marshall Tucker Band and Kobe Bryant have in common? Their last big hit was “Fire on the Mountain”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I live next to a kindergarten and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it’s me who has a drill around little children.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026