What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby with burst armbands
Why did the carrots laugh? They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.
Why are Chinese so good at jay-walking? Cause they can’t tell the difference between green and red light with their tiny eyes.
Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks… “Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?” “Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That’s why grandpa has to take the blue pills.”
Yo mama so ugly when her parents had a gender reveal part the balloon came out green.
What’s got 4 wheels, does a barrel roll, and goes from green to red in seconds? Kermit in a car crash.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe… Breathe…
what terns green purple and white? A chameleon
Me: Know one likes shrek he is just a fat green guy friend hey stop talking about me
What is the difference between artificial vanilla and Marjorie Taylor Greene’s children? Artifical vanilla come from a beaver’s asshole, the children from an asshole’s beaver.
The teacher asked her class to use definitely in a sentence. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. “The sky is definitely blue.” “Very good Kevin,but the sky can also be blue or black.” the teacher replied. Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him. And picked Annie from the back of the room. “The grass is definitely green.” “Very good Annie, but it can also be brown.” Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Finally she called on him. “Mines more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?” “Why no Johnny why would you ask such a question?” She questioned. “Well if they don’t have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself.”
Things said by racist aliens: “Some of my best friends are Green.” “I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship.” “You’re very pretty for a Purple girl.” “We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!” “Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people.” “You 2-headed people are so stupid!” “No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes.” “Get the hell out of my store you grigger!” “The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let’s burn some spaceships on the Greenies’ lawns!”
What is blue, green, flat and has teeth. The earth but I lied about the teeth
Why do midgets have to wear a green bright jacket when crossing the road? Because they will get turned into a pancake even more its not funny i know
What do you call a green boner the Grintch
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