Green jokes

what’s green then red all over? a frog in a blender! :)

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What’s green and smells of bacon ??? KERMITS FINGERS?? Why is a cabage green? Because its in Greenland

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Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks… “Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?” “Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That’s why grandpa has to take the blue pills.”

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What’s red and in a corner ? A baby with a razor blade What’s green and in a corner ? The same baby three weeks later

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What is black and white, black and white, black and white and green? Three zebras fighting over a pickle. Roses are red Grass is green I think of you sucking my peen

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What is Green and red and goes round and round? A frog in a blender (this next one is pretty bad, and I don’t mean it, so don’t get offended) What’s the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? One can support an average family

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Jack quietly crawled through Jill’s bedroom window, trying not to make a single noise. She sat on her bed, her back facing him. Jack tiptoed up behind her, laid his hands on her shoulders and said, in a rather sensual tone, “Boo.” “Jack!” She yelled, “what are you doing here?” Jack sat down next to her and smiled. “I figured today was a

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if red get vote out whit happed red is not vote red is a hacker so he kill blue ok so some one fondy blue boddy red sud where lime and green and prup sud how is red not die red am a hacker u noobs lime and grenn and prup run red killd therem all red the win but he is not the win black killd red black is the win lol

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A father of five puts on gas mask and a hazard suit, and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked “Dad, what are you wearing?”. The father would answer with “A costume for Halloween.”. the child asked “can i join?”. He said no, for he said it’s their last Halloween. *after that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.

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What is blue, green, flat and has teeth. The earth but I lied about the teeth

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My friend and I joined a french fry eating contest, but I just couldn’t ketchup. So we switched to cheese burgers, but I still couldn’t mustard up the speed to lettuce win. I mayo not have thought this through. So we switched to fruits, but when it got to the watermelons, I started to feel a little green. My friend couldn’t seed the point of us continuing anymore. I just couldn’t digest the stress I guess :D

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