A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!
A man walks into a bar. Sits down and asks the bartender for 12 shots of vodka. The bartender asks what the man is celebrating for and said he’ll give one shot on the house. The man said I celebrating my first blowjob. And nah if 12 shots doesn’t get the taste out of my mouth nothing will.
why the "hell :) " is this here
A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget and I am now traumatized to hell, the next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend. :) Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes! Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?
How do angels ?? make holy water ??? They boil the hell out of it.
Two Canadians die and end up in Hell. Satan decides to pay them a visit, so he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they’re happy. They tell him, “Well, we’re so sick of the cold where we’re from, and this place is nice and toasty.” Satan, annoyed, storms away and goes to Hell’s boiler room, where he turns up the temperature. He goes back to the Canadians’ room, along the way being begged by all sorts of people to put the heating back down. He enters the room to see the Canadians having a barbecue. Furiously, he asks them what they’re doing. “Well, we can’t pass up this wonderful weather without getting out the barbecue!” Satan realizes he’s been doing the wrong thing. He goes to the boiler room and turns it down until it’s at a colder temperature than ever seen on earth. He knows he’s won now, so he goes back to the Canadians’ room, only to see them jumping up and down in excitement. He shouts at them in fury, “WHY ARE YOU STILL HAPPY?!?!?!” They look at him and shout at the same time, “Hell froze over! That means the Leafs won!”
What does my head and hell have in common? They both have demons in them
a boy named jimmy was riding to hell to save his brothers and sister that is the last plase he pist there came a cross the devil part 1
what did Stephen Hawking have for breakfast his left sholder
THE ORPHANS ALL DIED!!! oh wait, no one cares… THEIR PARENTS ARE ALL DEAD ANYWAY, we are just making them happier, they get to join their parents in hell
Give a man a potato, he is full for a day Give a man a poisoned potato, hell be full for the rest of his life.
This guy is boiling water the girl walks in and says “What are you doing” the guy says “I’m making Holy Water” She said “How?” He said “I’m boiling the hell out of it”
I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters but it just wouldn’t land with people… I know, I’m going to hell…
What’s Steven Hawkins favorite song? Highway to hell because it’s a staircase to heaven.
My version of the Roses are red Poem in MW3: I thought Soap could trust you And so did I too So WHY IN BLOODY HELL DOES MAKAROV KNOW YOU?!
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