Give a man a potato, he is full for a day Give a man a poisoned potato, hell be full for the rest of his life.
If you don’t like orphan jokes, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ON HERE??!!! WE DON’T ACCEPT YOU HERE! If you saw an orphan, could you say where your parents at and if they cry, just say ‘hey here are your parents’ then grab nothing. perfect example.
My version of the Roses are red Poem in MW3: I thought Soap could trust you And so did I too So WHY IN BLOODY HELL DOES MAKAROV KNOW YOU?!
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, “When I get to Heaven, I will ask Jonah.” The teacher asked, “What if Jonah went to Hell?” The little girl replied, “Then you ask him.”
ahem… if somebody you dont like, or somebody random just calls you in general, answer the phone with this Hello thank you for choosing mamas pizzeria/ abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce how may i help you? or hello this is davids orphanage you make them we take them how may i help you? some people reactions are priceless and then the wonder about you mental health
Why did Steven Hawking go to hell not heaven Because there is a stairway to heaven, but there is not one to hell
3 people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: “Local calls are free”.
So a Irish man is walking his poodle and his buddy comes running up to him saying there’s a new pub in town and they’re giving out free pints. So the man picks up his dog and runs like hell to the bar. But the bar owner stops him and says sorry you can’t go in. The Irish man says why can’t I go in? Well you have a dog sir and that sign over there says no dogs aloud your going to have to leave him outside. Well the Irish man thinks quick and says. I’m blind it’s a seeing eye dog. The owner says that’s ridiculous a seeing eye dog would be a German shepherd or golden Labrador or something like that. The Irish man says well what kind of dog did they give me????
Kidnapping is just surprise adoption, congrats! You are now all my children! Just hop into the portal that leads to the Lust ring in hell-
The Tent Pole Is Up, The Canvas Is Spread, The Hell With Breakfast, Come Back To Bed. Take The Tent Pole Down, Put The Canvas Away, The Monkey Had A Hemorrhage, No Circus Today
Give Kobe a plane ticket, he’ll fly for the trip, but give Kobe a helicopter and he’ll fly for the rest of his life. I’M GOING TO HELL FOR THIS!!!
A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!
why the "hell :) " is this here
a boy named jimmy was riding to hell to save his brothers and sister that is the last plase he pist there came a cross the devil part 1
None of these jokes are close to funny! Btw who the hell is gwen?
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