Why can’t people in wheelchairs pass high school? The pacer test.
Today my stoner friend used my to-do list as a blunt wrap. – He was high on my list of priorities.
There were 30 high school seniors taking finals, and once they finished, the teacher, Mrs Jones walked up and down the classroom to collect the tests, and asked “so, are you guys ready for college?” And Brian answered “no way. School is just a waste of time, every day taking seven cruel hours of our lives.” Angela replied “never! Like Brian said, school is just a waste of time, and the next level is surely not worth paying $50,000 for. Besides, math class is mental abuse to humans!” And Jack said “school has been a waste of so much time I’ll never get back, and after these finals I’ve realized…f@ck, I never actually learned shit!”
a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try? ” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards… The steaks were pretty high
one depressed kid goes to high five a tree but the tree just left him hanging
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree? A: It left him/her/them hanging
I hate child murderers there always so high-pitched.
An Emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five… the tree left her hanging
When I finished high school, I wanted to take my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle, but my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was eighteen. And I could just have his motorcycle.
As a son I like sports and I watch sports with my mom. So one day we were looking at football. My mom ask me who makes the most money I said the quarter back. My mom told me I going to get a quarter back has my new boyfriend and it be your new step father. a week lady my mom went out I came home I see my mom making out with a high school kid. I said whats going on my mom said look my new boyfriend and new step father is the high school quarter back. My mom said see mission accomplish. I said yeah job well done.
What do yo get if you eat sugar. High
What do you call a chair that smokes weed? A high chair
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and touched Jill’s thigh and said “I know you wanna.” Jill said yes, took off her dress and then they had some fun. But silly Jill forgot her pills and now they have a son.
A high school student and his best friend were rushing to class after his best friend caused them both to be late, his best friend asked, “Would you like to hear a joke?” “Sure” he replied. "What do you and your sister have in common? ’ “I don’t know.” “Because of me you’re both late for your next period.”
RUS | ENG