Why don’t orphans get offended by dark humour jokes? It can’t hit home.
What’s a similarity between your best friend and a tree? They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
So Johnny was in kindergarten and his teacher assigned him to learn the ABC’s so he goes home and ask his mom who’s cooking “Whats the first letter of the ABC’s?” he ask and his mom responds with “SHUT UP… I’M COOKING!” so then he walks to sister who’s signing in the shower and asks her “Whats the 2nd letter of the ABC’s?” she responds with “I’m ready
Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.
What is stronger than family. The tree Paul Walker hit
A Teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular type of stuff. But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. "Janie, do you have a story to share ?’ ""Yes madam…My daddy told me a story about my Mom " “OK, let’s hear” said the teacher. “My Mom was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit”. “She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife”. “She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.” “She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.” Pin drop silence in the class !! ""Good Heavens" said the horrified teacher “What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story ? ” “Stay away from Mummy when she’s drunk```…!!!”
If you ever get Mad, just hit an orphan What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me.
Why did Joey drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck. (Don’t worry, the truck was fine.)
I’d Hit You But I Don’t Wanna Go To Jail For Animal Abuse.
Jason: Did you hear about the storm-trooper who attempted suicide? Dave: No. Jason: Well, he hit his first target.
Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver
When you hit a speed bump in a school zone and remember, there are no speed bumps.
Why did the kid drop his icecream? He got hit by a bus.
Depression hits harder than my dad
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