Student: a plane is carrying 204 bricks, one falls out, how many are left? Teacher: 203 Student: how do you put an elephant in the fridge? Teacher: You can’t Student: yes you can, open fridge door put elephant in. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Teacher: open door put in giraffe? Student: no, take out elephant put in giraffe. The lion king is having a party, who isn’t there? Teacher: let me guess, the lion Student: no the giraffe, he’s stuck in a fridge. Sally has to cross a river full of vicious alligators to get to safety, she gets across safely how? Teacher: she stepped on the alligators? Student: no the alligators are at the party, Sally dies anyway, how? Teacher: she frowned? Student: no, she was hit in the head by a falling brick.
Whole reason he is dead is because he kept hitting ‘Remind me later’ on his Windows Updates.
When you going 80 mph and hit a speed bump Then the speed bump starts screaming
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon, one smashes open when you hit it with a sledge hammer and the other is a water melon
Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t, I hit it with my car 3 blocks down
I’d Hit You But I Don’t Wanna Go To Jail For Animal Abuse.
If you ever get Mad, just hit an orphan
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
A man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try? ” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sht was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He BNED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.
Making fun of someone you’re angry with is childish. Be an adult and hit them with your car 3
What is it called when you hit your funny bone at night? Dark humor.
Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver
I lost my drivers license today i hit my ex with my car
Why don’t orphans get offended by dark humour jokes? It can’t hit home.
Best friend: dude your sister is hot i’d Hit that
Me: already did SWEEETT HOMMEE ALABAMA
I hit a ball with a bat it was called animal abuse
Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.
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