Hope jokes

A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel and when all the sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says father what is that? He says this sister is the wand of life. The nun says good, now go stick it in that camels ass and let’s get the hell outa here!

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Who ever is reading this I hope you have good day because I feel bad your so short

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How it be when the new guy takes too long… hay Danny, its me Johnny. Johnny: boss says to kill the guy in red. point the gun at his head. Danny: ok target locked. 3… 2… 1… bang. Johnny: danny hope you did not get the man in red Danny; OH MY BRO FOR REALL.

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I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win — however, no pun in ten did.

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Any body have nothing to do? Well here is a prank that you’ll never forget!

( Btw I never actually did this irl yet)

So tell your parents at night to come in in about 30 minutes cuz your legs hurt and you need them rubbed. So when they come in, pretend like your sleeping and right before they go out shout: NO! Then they will look at you but you’ll

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Whoever Stole My Anti-Depression Medications I Hope You’re Happy!

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Hope everyone is having a good day??

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To the guy who stole my depression medication, I hope you’re happy

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Why do emo kids sneak up on their Vietnamese grandfather’s? Because they hope the war experience kicks in.

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This is to the girl/boy named Gwen: Are you okay? i see there is a bunch of haters but DON’T i repeat, DON’T let the haters get to you. i hope you see this and respon and that you are okay plz Gwen be honest.

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Hope this good

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A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers”.

She replies: “Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?”

To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”

I hope ya’ll that have depression kys you are worthless trash

Just kidding

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Cremation: My last hope for a smoking hot body.

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This Dwarf was being mean to me so I said “when you get home I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you.”

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The department of touch yourself is coming to the UK near you, I hope Scotland gets freedom I can’t wait to leave England and live in Scotland.

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