in English class the teacher says (Teacher): Kids you need to say the alphabet ok Sally you first. (Sally): Okay a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z. (Teacher): good job Sally. Then the teacher called on 4 other students who got it right. Then the teacher called on little Johnny. (Teacher): Little Johnny say the alphabet. (Little Johnny): bcefghijklmnopsvwxyz. (Teacher): no Johnny that’s not right. (Johnny): oh I forgot u r a q t. (Teacher). No still not right and thank you. (Johnny): oh I’ll give you the d later . (Class): (laughing). (Teacher): GO TO THE OFFICE NOW .
My ex died today. I also lost my job as a butcher
Boobs are like batteries… AA will get the job done… C is bigger than AA… D is bigger that C… …and if they’re square, you don’t want to put your tongue on them!
My sister told me she like Medusa. I said h. My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy facial expression and when the look down they do nothing, but stay still.
Why did the dwarf get a job at lidl? Because every lidl heps
Man: I got fired from my job at the calander factory. Lady: What did you do? Man: I took a day of… My grief counsellor died today. He did such a great job. I don’t even care
A man walked into a shop and asked the shop keeper for a potato-clock. The shop keeper said, "I dont know what a potato clock is’ The man said, "me neither but im starting a new job and my boss told me work starts at 9 so id have to get a potato clock
what’s the difference between your job and a dead hooker? your job still sucks
what do you not want to do when it comes to giving an emo a job? showing them the ropes.
I went for a job interview today and the manager said, “We’re looking for someone who is responsible.” “Well, I’m your man.” I replied, “In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.”
I went to my sister room one day. I see a trophy, so I ask my sister how did you won this trophy my sister said to me the neighbors gave it to me because I gave out the best hand jobs in the neighbor. I guess my sister put her hands in good use.
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory. It was soda-pressing.
What did the wind say to the palm tree? Hold onto your nuts this is no ordinary blow job.
Why did the girl quit her job at the donut factory? – She was fed up with the hole business.
What do you call a giraffe giving a blow job to another giraffe? Getting neck!
RUS | ENG
