one day, little Sally hears the phone ringing. she picks it up "Hello, this is daddy, Sally. Is your mom nearby." Sally says, “No, shes upstairs with Uncle john” “Uncle john? i don’t know an Uncle John.” “no, no, no, you must be mistaken, daddy” “no i’m sure there’s no one named Uncle John in our family.” “Okay, but why did you call?” Says Sally. “Ummm no reason, just tell mommy that daddy’s pulling into the driveway right now.” “Okay daddy!” long pause "Okay daddy! I did it!’ “Great job Sally! What did she says?” “Mommy said OH FU… and then she ran around with no clothes on and tripped on the carpet and hit her head on the bookshelf. shes now resting it looks like… then Uncle John screams and jumps out the window into the swimming pool, but of course we took all the water out this winter…” then dad replies “Swimming pool? we dont have a…is this 468-1843?”
what is the perfect job for a paedophile a physical doctor for kids
A dad told his son never to hit girls so the sun repeid i promis. When the sun got older he was doing the dirty with "a girl " and the girl sais spank me daddy… and the sons repsonds my dad said never to hit a girl. and the “girl” takes of the wig and its his dad and the dad said good job son!.. Son:… um
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there.
So your in a hospital you barely survive your suicide attempt you see one of the scalpels you finish the job
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!!
Employer: Can you preform under pressure? Me: No, but i do a pretty good Bohemian Rhapsody.
i just found out my ex got stabbed today…lets just say i lost my job as a butcher
Today I learned that a group of piranhas can maul a small child down to the bone in under 20 seconds. Well I lost my job at the aquarium today.
What did the wind say to the palm tree? Hold onto your nuts this is no ordinary blow job.
Man: I got fired from my job at the calander factory. Lady: What did you do? Man: I took a day of… My grief counsellor died today. He did such a great job. I don’t even care
my job is so amazing. today a man asked me to check his balance, so i pushed him over. his balance isn’t good
My grief counselor died the other day He was so good at his job, i don’t even care.
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
how come orphans know how to do laundry cause thats usually the moms job
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