What’s My Favorite Thing About My Grandpa? His life insurance…
When Jim was playing on his phone, my grandfather told him, “You use way too much technology!”. Jim then said, “No, YOU use too much technology! ” and then Jim disconnected his grandfather’s life support.
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
my happiest moment in life was getting a positive grade on my h.i.v test w/out studying
whats the difference between a maze and a depressed life? one of them you can find a way out of
You know what relationships and life? They both come to an end
My doctor said I only have 1 year to live, so I killed him. Got sentenced to life in prison, problem solved!
Teacher: People with Depression never get anywhere in life. Student 1: My mom has depression, but she died. Student 2: My sister has depression and she’s going to Therapy. Student 3: My Dad Has depression, and he’s Doing REALLY Well
it says enter a joke, but I can’t enter my life.
I have a funny joke: my life
As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life change when I found out she was under the horse.
what makes a nuke and divorce the same? it only takes one of each to end your life.
When I was a kid I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.
My mom trying to get me to do dishes Mom: I gave you life and you should be able to wash dishes. Me: Why did you? Mom: I was very drunk… Explains a lot…
when you frend ask why dont you smile then you look at them and then rels no one there becase you have no frinds #my life
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