And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.” But John came fifth, and he got a toaster.
1 your so dumb you thing Cheerios are donut seeds! Your so fat you could sell shade! Your just like coconut water, nobody likes you! 4 you been shopping lately because there selling lives around the corner, you should go get one! If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence !! Are these good
Website: Submit a joke :-) Me: My life.
Define abnormal life. Waking up everyday living a sane life! I liked my life when I first got it…later they said no because I didn’t have the receipt.
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly dissapointing
A cow went into a pride of lion’s territory? Since that moment he knew his life was on stake
life is like giving head…it always sucks
In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common? They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.
As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life change when I found out she was under the horse.
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack I always hit on 16, the get busted
whats the difference between life and death…life hurts
If I was an object in this world I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge I will likely shatter and break. If I was a pizza topping I would be pineapple! Because everybody doubts me. I’m a star! Because one of these days I’m going to crash and burn… If I could choose what creature I come back as after I die I’d be a panda, because people
1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words… “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance… only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours… lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
What made me laugh? The fact that my life is a joke:")
life’s too short to want it.
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