Website: Submit a joke :-) Me: My life.
The most confusing day of my life was when I found out my toaster was waterproof.
you looking for jokes? i have one, your life
What did Earth say to the other planets? – “You guys have no life!”
As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life change when I found out she was under the horse.
If being ugly was a crime you would have a life sentence My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships There is a tree out there giving you oxegyn, and you owe that tree an apology. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone. When I saw your dad on the side walk I didn’t laugh but the sidewalk cracked up. If I had powers I would make you the dumbest person alive but it seems life already beat me to the punch. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart I’d be broke. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting Were you born on a highway cuz that’s where most accidents happen Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya Your the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented
whats the difference between life and death…life hurts
Teacher: People with Depression never get anywhere in life. Student 1: My mom has depression, but she died. Student 2: My sister has depression and she’s going to Therapy. Student 3: My Dad Has depression, and he’s Doing REALLY Well
And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.” But John came fifth, and he got a toaster.
“Don’t worry! Life goes on” “Yeah that’s what’s had me worried”
it says enter a joke, but I can’t enter my life.
I was talking to a beaver about my life. I dont think he really gave a dam about it at all.
I was having issues in my personal and professional life. I hated everyone. I was on the brink of a mental breakdown and depression. I decided to see a therapist about it. The therapist suggested that I should write letters to the people I hate and then burn them. I must admit I feel much better… But now I don’t know what to do with the letters.
How do you know when an orphan is lying. When they say I swear on my mother’s life
Remember kids, when you’re angry, burn down an orphanage. Then they’ll really be living the hard knock life.
RUS | ENG
