Lost jokes

My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12

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A woman gets rid of polish with chemicals and no one bats an eye The Germans got rid of polish with chemicals and everyone lost their mind

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Why is the USA bad a at clash Royale?, cause they already lost two towers

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A little kid was lost and he asked me to find his home, I love working at the orphanage

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My cousin: Brother I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile however I left it as it is] Me: so tell me about it then. My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi Me: somebody? Don’t they have like the name of you opponents? My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I Me: Ok my bad. Continue My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi and 5 seconds later I got kill but [by] Sum_Fing_Wong. Me: it’s not wrong! In call of duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed. My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G Me: my bad again. Do continue. My cousin: I got so angry I blowup Me: so you got blowed up, by what weapon? My cousin: by the game. Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]

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One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive! My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back

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I lost at Kahoot so I had to ka-shoot

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Where did Joe go after getting lost on the mine field? Everywhere.

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I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again but if life is a labyrinth, I’d always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favourite…

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when the quiet kid lost a game of basket ball and reaches in to his bag other people in gym: oh shit this nigga bouta shot

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Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.

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What do you call a lost indian women? Ms Singh

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Why did Steven hawking die? He lost wifi connection and don’t get the data plan.

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Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home ? He lost the whey!??

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I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs. Gravity sure is fast

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