Today was a terrible day. My wife got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”
What do you call a magician who has lost their magic? Ian.
What do you call a lost indian women? Ms Singh
A little kid was lost and he asked me to find his home, I love working at the orphanage
Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home ? He lost the whey!??
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Looks like I lost an electron, I should keep a better ion them.
A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an exposition to the Amazon Forest. After a while they get lost. So as they are walking suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says "Hey, your in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die." The man from France said, "bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "bring me the gun" And the man from New York said, "bring me a fork" The guy was confused with the fork but still brought it the items and gave it to them. The guy from France said, “for the France!” And drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “long live the queen!” And shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said “MAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU f@ckERS”
Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar Because he Lost May!!
why are americans so bad at chess? Because they lost two towers
Where did Suzy go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere
Yo mama so fat i stood next to her and lost cell phone reception
sans:why was the skeleton depressed? because frisk keeps reseting and it resets when he lost his phone
Chris Rock: Jada I can’t wait to see you in G.I Jane 2! Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing: Will: I got in one lil fight about my wife’s lost hair, she said,‘’ Will if you don’t do something I’m gonna have an affair!‘’ ??????
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