Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.
Stephen Hawking died because he accidentaly lost his bluetooth connection
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, “Awwww, I wish my friends were here.”
Why does Spider-Man only have 11 months? He lost may.
How did Stephen Hawking Die, He lost WiFi Connection.
Where did Suzy go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere
My cousin: Brother I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile however I left it as it is] Me: so tell me about it then. My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi Me: somebody? Don’t they have like the name of you opponents? My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I Me: Ok my bad. Continue My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi and 5 seconds later I got kill but [by] Sum_Fing_Wong. Me: it’s not wrong! In call of duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed. My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G Me: my bad again. Do continue. My cousin: I got so angry I blowup Me: so you got blowed up, by what weapon? My cousin: by the game. Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]
My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.
What do you call a magician who has lost their magic? Ian.
My Mum texted me she had lost her phone
I used to be a banker but I lost interest… Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She always ran away from the ball. Why can’t bikes stand? Because they are two tired (Too tired)
whats one thing youll never find in lost and found? your dad
A little kid was lost and he asked me to find his home, I love working at the orphanage
Your forehead is so big, Megamind though he was your long lost sibling. (me)
An orphan walks into a supermarket, gets lost calls for his mum then remembers
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