Are you a walnut because I’m about to nut all over your walls!
The popular girl told me "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!" Two weeks later, She shows up pregnant. … I guess her rubber broke too
my best friend got ligma (ah did he, sorry bro) LIGMA BALLS
I have a pun, but I will nut-tella you!
2 nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other “I’m-a cashew!”
Me: Do you like smash? Friend: Smash Rolls? Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS! Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
DEEEZ NUTS
have you heard of the… uh Pokemon called uh rhy… rhy rhydon deez nuts
What do you call a Dino stripper? A dinowhore
One day little johnny went to his grandma’s house and she asks “do you like nuts” and little johnny says “yes i like nuts” and his grandma says “okay then grab them out of the cabinet” so little johnny went and grabbed them and he was sad after he grabbed them his grandma then says “whats wrong? ” little johnny says “i thought they were real nuts.” and his grandma fainted.
I tried to come up with a funny pun about squirrels, but all my ideas were nuts
what do u call a nut in jail: a busted nut
What falls and never gets hurt? Snow
What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well beer nuts are 49 cents but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer you won’t understand it.)
Did you guys see on the news where they arrested that pervert at the Michaels Crafts store?? He was running around completely naked and had sprinkled glitter all over his testicles. I guess it was pretty nuts.
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