Q, Why did the elephant paint his toenails red? A, To hide up cherry trees. Q, What’s the loudest noise in the jungle? A, Giraffes eating cherries.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well it depends how hard you can throw.
What do Michaelangelo and Hitler have in common? They both used their brain to paint the ceiling
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good
A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, ‘This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for ?300 as long as you can say it in three words.’ The guy replies, ‘Hey, why not?’ He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays ? 300 on the bar, and says slowly. ‘Paint…my….house.’
"…This morning, I came out my front door to see my neighbor frantically trying to scrub off the word “PEDO” that had been spray-painted on his front window. “What’s been going on John? ”’ I asked. “f@cking kids,” came his mumbled reply. The dirty bastard!’
Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, Brown and yellow? So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, if you throw it hard enough.
A father and a son were painting pictures together, the son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T and the son said “what happened to your hand?” looking at the scar tissue near the father’s knuckle, the father replied with “you know what happened, you were there.” the son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings - they’re exactly the same. The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there’s only one painting.
One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, “OH! THE HUMANATEE!”
What brand of paint Michael Jackson use to paint Neverland Ranch? Dutch Boy.
What is the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes 1 nail to hang a painting!
how do you confuse a blonde? paint yourself green and throw forks at her
Why did the painting go to jail? Because it was framed!
What did the house painter ask when he went to the abortion clinic? Where do you keep the cans of paint?
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